🏴‍☠️ How to Stay Calm When It Counts

Hey, it’s Kinza.

Last year, I looked successful on paper. I had turned around and exited a business. I was supposed to feel proud, accomplished, even relieved.

Instead, I felt flat.

I was waking up early, anxious, with nothing to point that urgency at. I missed the rhythm. The people. The decisions. The sense of direction.

Turns out, you can sell the business and still be stuck in founder mode.

What no one tells you is this: The hardest part isn’t the work. It’s what happens when the work is done and you don’t recognize yourself without the chaos.

That experience, and working with founders who go through the same thing, is why I built Chief Rebel. And it’s why today’s issue is focused on one of the most underrated but transformational skills a founder can build:

Staying calm when it counts.

Best Links

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Deep Dive

One of my clients, Dhruv, was in a leadership meeting with his team. Tension was high. Revenue was down. A key employee had just quit. Everyone looked to him to fix it.

The old Dhruv would’ve jumped in, filled the silence, barked solutions, and walked out feeling drained with nothing solved.

This time, he did something different.

He paused. Sat back. Listened. Asked real questions.

And something shifted.

The team opened up. People took ownership. Real issues came to the surface. That day, Dhruv didn’t just lead. He created space for others to lead too.

It’s easy to confuse being reactive with being responsible. But the most grounded founders I know aren’t loud. They’re deliberate.

They listen before they speak. They let silence do some of the work. They make space without giving up control.

Takeaways: 20 Power Phrases That Actually Land

When someone’s in pain:

• That sounds really hard. I'm sorry you're dealing with that.

• It makes sense that you'd feel that way.

• Thank you for sharing that with me.

When you’re not quite sure what they mean:

• Just to be clear, are you saying...?

• Can you walk me through what you meant by...?

• Let me make sure I’ve got it right. Does this sound accurate?

When you want to build trust:

• I’m listening. Please keep going.

• I appreciate you being open.

• I really want to understand where you’re coming from.

When you’re ready to respond:

• Let me take a second before I answer. I want to honor what you said.

• Do you want my thoughts, or do you just need space to talk this out?

• That gives me a lot to think about. What would be most helpful from me?

Want the breakdown? View the full post here.

Before You Go

I built Chief Rebel because I didn’t want other founders to go through post-exit whiplash alone.

The best leaders aren’t the loudest.

They’re the most aligned.

If you’ve been wondering if calm leadership is possible without sacrificing performance, this newsletter is your signal to start.

See you next week.

-Kinza